It has been a little while since I have posted. It has been a crazy couple of weeks. The Thursday before last my old boss called from the nursing agency and asked if I could work!! I had been desperately searching for work so this was a very welcome surprise! So for the past week I have been working at night and this Wednesday I started back at school to work towards my RN degree! It has all been so exciting!!! A very far cry from the situation I was in three weeks ago. I welcome it though and feel like new breath has been breathed into me. I do so appreciate everything I have more now than ever before. Nothing like losing everything to make you appreciate everything that comes to you.
I had a wonderful day today! I slept in, went job hunting and then had time to peruse in a bookstore! Lovely! It was bright and sunny and I enjoyed getting out and driving.
It was so relaxing in the bookstore. That is where I feel most comfortable and at ease. Being one with all the books and looking at the titles and all the different shapes and sizes and textures. I love the smell : kind of musty and old. Comforting. It just makes me want to grab a cup of tea and just inhale.
The drive home was also nice. I listened to NPR All Things Considered and just absorbed the news. I like to learn things by listening to the news. I would say I am almost an information junkie. : )
For the evening I plan on cooking and watching Peter Lorre films on my favorite station TCM.
Today I have a job interview at HEB. I am going to take this job until a nursing job opens up. The human resources process alone drags on in nursing and my bill collectors don’t get that. I have been a cashier before so it will be an easy stress free job until something else comes along and it will enable me to get back into school this fall.
Getting ready for a job interview is always so nerve wracking. You always wonder , “am I dressed right?”, “Do I look good” ? All of the questions are running through my head and just want to appear confident but not cocky. I am looking forward to just having a regular schedule again.
It was a lovely evening tonight. I took a walk to shake the doldrums off. The moon was out: a perfect crescent shaped moon. So bright against the black night. The air smelled fresh after the days rain and all was calm. I have a relaxing night planned: a hot bubble bath, the lights dim and warm, a brick of raspberry dark chocolate, and a book. With all this, then I will know that all is well in my world again and I will prepare for a perfect day tomorrow.
Things I enjoy that pass the time: browsing bookstores for hours, reading, sitting in a cafe sipping coffee or tea, listening to beautiful music, watching old movies, daydreaming.
I have been out of work for the summer. It has been emotionally draining. This is the first time in my career I have been out of work. I have been on countless interviews that all end the same. “Sorry we are looking for someone with more experience” . The age old question I want to ask them is ” How do I get experience if everyone is looking for experience?”
So, I spend my days wanting to at least look productive. With nothing much to do that is a hard task. No money also limits your choices. So, I read, daydream, watch old movies and do the mundane life management tasks. It is a battle to not become numb. That is what I am fighting. I want to keep my mind alive and energetic. I do not want to become stale and crusty.
Today was a boring day. I wanted to be productive but did not know what to do. My days are often filled with mind-numbing games and TV. Boring. Its like I have this idea of a good perfect life that makes me happy but I just do not do it. I feel better when I do but it is hard to get started.